Welcome back to my playground, fiends and friends.
Tonight’s podcast episode is devoted to some surprisingly popular kinks: hotwives and cuckolds.
I’m joined by Brenna and Brian from Front Porch Swingers for this extremely intriguing discussion about hotwifing and cuckolding.
Here are some of the questions we’ll be addressing together:
Want to know the difference between cuckolding and hotwifing?
Want to learn more about whether or not jealousy plays a role in a hotwife or cuckold scenario?
How do these scenarios play out in real life?
We’re going to get down and dirty with the intimate details of their unique relationship and explore how opening up your relationship to new erotic possibilities can improve your relationship and your sex life.
We also explore some of the dynamics of BDSM that contribute to Brenna and Brian’s unique relationship dynamic, the importance of female empowerment in their relationship and in the lifestyle, and the importance of honest and open communication in a relationship.
Check out their bio to get a feel for why that’s the case with them:
From meeting on Craigslist Casual Encounters (RIP) to participating in a BDSM dynamic to swinging, we are far from what most people would consider “The Norm.” That being said, you would be hard-pressed to find people in a more healthy, communicative relationship than us. We talk about everything, work through any and all concerns about our play, and are committed to one another on a level that some can’t imagine.
That has not been the case in our previous relationships. Between the two of us, we have 5 failed marriages under our belts. We repeatedly found ourselves in unfulfilling relationships, unable to be our true selves for fear of judgement and/or rejection from our partners. We strongly feel that the less than positive experiences in our pasts have prepared us well for happy and enriched lives together. We know what it takes to develop complete trust and honesty in a relationship, and are passionate about helping others attain it.
Our podcast, blog, and future coaching provide us an opportunity to share our failures and successes with other like-minded folks. Our goal is to create content based not only on our personal experiences, but also on the vast amount of research we’ve done on BDSM, swinging, polyamory, and so much more. We’re passionate about providing insights on how to live your most fulfilled and adventurous life possible!
Welcome back to my playground, my feisty fiends, fetishists, kinksters and pervs.
(Because if you’re not some kind of perv, what are you even doing here?!)
Tonight’s episode is one of my favorites. Yeah, I’m probably biased…
I first met King Heff at the Sex Down South Conference 2018 in Atlanta late last year, and one of my first memories of him was watching him flog someone. It was so well done, it was no surprise that there was a line of women waiting for their turn. Clearly, he knew exactly what he was doing.
I do get a bit personal too about my own techniques and my way of thinking about BDSM, so if you’re curious about what it’s like to be in the brain of a genuine Switch (someone who can be both dominant and submissive), then you should listen to tonight’s episode.
Here are some of the questions we’re going to explore together and give you some of the answers you’ve been seeking:
Thinking of experimenting with some BDSM but don’t know where to start?
Are you a more seasoned fetish player in search of some new techniques to try on your submissive?
If you’re looking to explore the more sensual side of BDSM, and learn how you can get out your own kinks, join me today with King Heff, a sexual enhancement product specialist from Charlotte, North Carolina, also known as the creator of Pink Heffs and Black Heffs and an expert in the art of sensual impact play.
King Heff is going to reveal what to do when we’re first getting started with a new submissive, how to communicate and establish consent, how to manage different elements of a BDSM scene, as well as some physical and psychological domination and obedience training techniques you can try on your submissive.
We’ll also discuss behavior correction, how to select the right BDSM toys and tools to use on your partner, and the importance of after care with your submissive.
Group sex can be complicated, from finding the perfect partners who are open-minded, who you’re attracted to, who are down to play with you and often, with other people in the orgy.
I admit that my first orgy actually came quite naturally. It was spontaneous and it was a fantastic experience. I wasn’t nervous, and there was absolutely no issue with consent with myself nor my partners. We communicated about who we wanted to play with before we went into it, although we had no specific expectations, and once we were all touching each other, we just went with the flow. And everyone had a bangin’ good time!
Are you curious about what it’s like to be part of an orgy?
Are there rules to being in an orgy, or is group sex just a free-for-all?
How do you find the right people for an orgy?
How do you protect yourself sexually when you’re in a group sex situation?
How do you establish your boundaries and limits with the other participants? Can you say no to people you don’t necessarily want to play with?
Who is an orgy for? Is it just for swingers? Singles? Couples?
And with so many moving parts, how do you keep track of everyone’s pleasure while making sure you have an amazing experience?
If you want to explore all of these in-depth questions about group sex, and turn your fantasy to reality on your own or with your partner, join me tonight with my guests Taara Rose and James, hosts of Sex Uninterrupted podcast on The Sexy Lifestyle Network.
We’re going to get personal with you about our own orgy experiences, give you practical tips and advice for communicating with your partner and your sex group, how to break the ice, and how to make sure everything is running smoothly.
We’ll also explore how to make sure you’re all practicing safe sex, so that everyone can have a consensually non-monogamous good time.
Because that’s what being in an orgy should be all about – letting yourself go and enjoying all the sensations and stimulation of being with multiple people at once!
The era of shameless sex has arrived, and it’s all about shattering social stigmas and exploring taboos.
Carol and David of The Sexy Lifestyle invited me and Jean from SDC to record a podcast with them, celebrating their 2nd year of podcasting as The Sexy Lifestyle.
It was also a great chance for us to talk about how both of our platforms, The Sexy Lifestyle Network as well as SDC.com, are changing the way people think about sex, and the way they access reliable information about sexuality, relationships and health.
If you’ve been seeking a wealth of trustworthy information about sex, pleasure, relationships and health, our two major platforms SDC.com and The Sexy Lifestyle Network are becoming the new leaders to change the way adults think and learn about sex.
Together, we’re bringing you podcasts, videos and articles that cover every possible topic in the ever-changing sexual landscape, sprinkled with some exciting personal real-life experiences of our own.
In this special episode celebrating the second anniversary of Carol and David’s The Sexy Lifestyle podcast, Carol and I co-host our round table discussion with our guests David and Jean, to talk about how our networks have joined forces with sex, relationship and health experts around the world.
Tonight, we explore important subjects like threesomes, the erotic lifestyle, bisexuality, and more taboos in this one-of-a-kind episode to honor the diversity and importance of sexuality.
I had such a fun time recording with Carol and David, as usual, but even more rewarding was knowing that we truly are making a difference in the way people feel about their sexuality, encouraging them to talk about their sexuality even more openly with others – especially their partners, and to not be shy seeking out information when they don’t know the answers. Now we’re here to help provide all that information in one place, where you can check out articles, podcasts and videos from honest, reliable and trusted clinicians, doctors, bloggers and more from all around the world.
So give it a listen tonight at 5 PM PST / 8 PM EST and hear how we’re helping create a revolution in sex – and how you can become a part of it, too.
This past weekend, from January 18-20, 2019, The Place Bonaventure Exhibition Halls were MY playground – and I shared it with a lot of sexy people!
Some of you came out to The Salon de l’Amour et de la Séduction (aka The Taboo Show) to check out the sexy fun, and were rewarded with informative seminars about sexuality, booths filled to the brim with sex toys, lingerie and fetish wear, a dungeon area, live burlesque performances and dance shows, and of course, THE highlight of the entire weekend – the SDC / l’Orage Zone Libertine.
I confess – without shame! – that I was also one of the first to try it out.
The play area was blocked off with heavy black curtains from the crowd for privacy, but inside, it was a miniature version of what you would find upstairs at l’Orage – equipped with a few covered mattresses, some couches, a wash-up station, towels, wipes, condoms and other amenities to make the experience cleaner, safer and more pleasurable for anyone who wished to play.
And a lot of people thoroughly enjoyed themselves – apparent by the smiles and mussed-up hair they had when they exited the play area!
Outside this private area, SDC had set up a large dance floor where we could dance, and that was also where local shibari bondage experts Paco and Fanny entertained us with several shibari shows. During these performances, Paco tied up Fanny in a sensual, artistic way, and dozens of people came to surround them and watch. It was extremely erotic. Check them out Shibari Fun here on Facebook.
Other vendors within the lifestyle were in the SDC / l’Orage section also, from erotic photographers like Ressan and Fabrice de Bray, to lingerie and fetish boutique Il Bolero, as well as various local libertine groups.
What we all had in common was our desire to contribute and educate others about our libertine mentality and way of life, of the sense of community we share, and the way that we celebrate sexuality rather than hiding ourselves away from society.
In the midst of all this, I presented several seminars on the We-Vibe Womanizer stage on two topics: How to Seduce with Body Language and Your Sexual Renaissance: Discover Your Self-Confidence.
Presenting these seminars was an incredibly rewarding experience for me, because after each of them, I had a bunch of people coming up to me to thank me for the presentation, ask me more questions, and also to talk to me about their own bodies and personal stories. This inspired me to consider offering individual coaching sessions to help others discover their self-confidence and improve their sex lives. More on that – coming soon.
L’Orage Club also offered a popular presentation entitled First Visit To a Sex Club: Are There Rules and Expectations?which helped answer a lot of people’s questions about how to behave within a libertine club, the importance of consent and respect, and the power of NO means NO. I know that their seminar helped debunk a lot of commonly held myths about swingers, the legality of sex clubs such as l’Orage, the erotic lifestyle and the practices of its libertine individuals.
I also thoroughly enjoyed seminars from my scintillating friend and sexuality expert Luna Matatas, who presented on Get Great at Going Down, Bigger and Wetter Orgasms, and Best Booty Sex. (Speaking of Luna, if you haven’t yet heard my podcast episode with her about How to Have a Threesome, check it out here!)
So not only was the Salon a success on so many different levels, but it reminded me yet again why I’m here, doing what I’m doing – to educate others, to help others find their way of expressing their sexuality shamelessly!
Tonight’s episode is focused on relationships, so you’re going to want to pay attention. Whether you’re dating, engaged, or married, in a monogamous, monogamish, consensually non-monogamous, or polyamorous relationship, the advice you’re going to get in this podcast can help you and your partner(s) through a lot of common relationship snafus.
If you want to learn how to improve communication and intimacy as a couple, you’ll benefit from today’s podcast with the co-founders of Soulmates for Life, internationally renowned author and licensed clinician Dr. Jay, and his soul mate, master certified coach, Liseth.
Here are some of the major questions my guests will be answering:
What is the true definition of a Soul Mate? Do you want to discover how to master your relationship and become a better partner?
With the expert guidance of Dr. Jay and Liseth, we’re going to explore the science of soulmating, the importance of expressing honesty and communication in your relationship, and taking your love life to the next level (like if you’ve both decided to open up your relationship to venture into non-monogamous waters).
In this podcast, we talk about the kinds of people and couples who might need a relationship coach, and when there are some red flags in your relationship that signal the need for coaching to improve the status quo.
Dr. Jay and Liseth also reveal useful strategies to overcome conflict, for times when you’re having a risky conversation with your partner and things explode or become difficult.
There’s no such thing as being in a relationship without conflict or without argument. We need to have arguments in order to grow together and improve things if they’re not going the way you both want. But it’s important to learn how to fight the right way (and not say things we don’t mean or that we can’t take back), and to be able to swiftly repair things between yourselves, or there can be lasting damage.
That’s why relationship coaching (listen to the podcast to hear how they distinguish coaching from couples therapy) can be so beneficial to every couple, regardless how long you’ve been together, what kind of relationship you’re in, or the kinds of problems you’re having.
Welcome back to my playground, Lexual fiends and friends.
January – aka Resolution Time – is still in full swing, and people are struggling to stick to all the lofty resolutions and goals they set for themselves, however impossible they might seem to achieve. Like going to the gym, changing your eating habits, and taking more time for yourself, for instance. Does that sound like you or anyone in your entourage?
Goal-setting (and resolution-making) is easy to do. But following through on them is the hard part. Especially since when we’re in the early goal-setting stages, we have high aspirations and tend to overdo it by being a tad unrealistic – like resolving to do too much in an unreasonably short time frame.
So it’s no wonder that so many of us fail at following through on our resolutions – and once broken, say FUCK IT and figure well, I already failed, no point in getting back on that horse.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Megan Stubbs, reputed sexologist specializing in sexual wellness, education and pleasure, is going to teach us that it’s OKAY to fail, and not to let that totally derail our plans, goals and resolutions.
We’re also going to address important questions like:
Why is self-care one the fastest-growing wellness trends in the last few years? How is self-care so important and beneficial to your sexual, physical and mental health?
If you want to know how to get into the habit of prioritizing yourself, even with a busy schedule, you’ll enjoy tonight’s podcast.
We’re going to explore the different types of self-care and how they contribute to a healthier YOU, and how those benefits can spill over into having more positive relationships with others. We discuss the reasons why millennials seem to be so much more interested in self-care than previous generations, as well as who is most likely to engage in wellness practices.
With Megan’s wellness goal-setting tips and advice on what to do if you can’t stick to your goals or New Year’s Resolutions, you’ll be well on your way to a healthier mind and body in no time.
Come join me in my playground next weekend at the Salon de l’Amour et de la Seduction – aka The Taboo Sex Show – in Montreal, Quebec, Canada!
I’m thrilled to be joining our amazing SDC team, along with Montreal’s favorite libertine nightclub, l’Orage. Sure, I’ll be hanging out with a bunch of sexy, open-minded people, prancing around like I own the place, talking to everyone about shamelessly expressing their sexuality, all while recording some podcasts and promoting SDC, l’Orage and of course, myself – Mistress Lexi.
Did I mention I’m also going to be hosting seminars for your enjoyment and educational benefit?
I’ll be onstage in the We-Vibe Seminar Theater, talking (in French, no less) about:
Body Language: Express Yourself Without Saying a Word
Your Sexual Renaissance: Discover Your Self-Confidence
Not a bad way to kick off 2019, in my not-so-humble opinion.
Over the next week and half, up until Friday January 18, I’ll be giving away free weekend passes to the Salon – so be sure to follow me on social media on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram and be on the lookout for my posts!
I admit, it’s hard to believe that just last year, at this time, I was meeting the SDC team for the first time. I had absolutely no idea that one year later, I would be in this position – with my own podcast on The Sexy Lifestyle Network via Voice America, working with SDC on so many exciting new projects, and promoting the club – l’Orage – where I had my first ever experiences in the libertine / swinger community.
Just goes to show, you never know what could happen to you when you keep an open mind and seize the right opportunities when they come your way!
I am so excited to be able to share my thoughts about sexuality with you all, whether on my podcasts, by writing articles about sex or erotic literature, or at my seminars and workshops.
So come join us during The Taboo Sex Show! It’s going to be a wild time!
Welcome back to your favorite playground. For my first podcast episode of 2019, I present to you a very juicy one indeed – the topic you’ve all been waiting for: FEMALE ORGASMS!
What are the secrets to pleasing a woman sexually? Do you want to learn more about how to make a woman orgasm and squirt? If you want to know what makes a woman cum, you’re going to LOVE tonight’s podcast!
By the way, in case you needed extra incentive, I’ll be getting VERY personal and talking about my first ever squirting experience! It’s not often that I tell sex stories on air, but like I said, this is one hell of a JUICY episode! So definitely DON’T MISS IT!
I’ll be hosting my special guest, Marla Renee Stewart, aka The Sex Architect, who’s a professional sex educator, sex, intimacy and relationship coach, founder of Velvet Lips and co-host of The Sisters of Sexuality podcast on The Sexy Lifestyle Network.
We’re going to help crack the code (aka Rubik’s Cube!) of the elusive female climax, debunk common myths about female sexuality, present lesser-known facts about women’s pleasure, and enhance your sexual confidence to become a better lover -regardless of your sexuality and the type of relationship you’re in.
By answering questions like “what exactly IS squirting?”, “what are the different types of orgasms a woman can have?”, and “how much of a woman’s orgasm is mental versus physical?” we’ll be exploring all the different ways you can give a woman the utmost pleasure!
Because let’s be honest. Regardless of how much sexual experience you have, and how much of an incredible lover you are, or are reputed to be, or have been told you are – we can all benefit from learning more about sex and sexuality. Anyone who says they are a master or mistress in the bedroom MAY have a lot of sexual experience, but it doesn’t mean that you’re able to make just EVERY woman cum at the drop of the hat.
Especially because we know that what makes one woman scream with pleasure may not work on another woman. Every body is different, and so are our tastes, desires, and fantasies. So practice makes purr-fect…
Thank you for supporting me throughout this year! 2019 will be bringing a lot of opportunity for me to show you even more of my appreciation. Big news coming soon to my podcast, blog and social media – so stay tuned, my friends and fiends.
For now, I’m sharing my last Top 10 list of 2018 with you. Make these resolutions part of your list when you’re thinking of ways to improve your life – and your sex life- this coming year.
10. Seduce yourself
Make yourself feel sexy and constantly remind yourself that you’re desirable and you deserve to be desired. That confidence will spill over into all the other areas of your life.
Wear sexy lingerie under your work clothes,
even if you’re the only one who knows they’re there. Masturbate whenever the
hell you want. Read an erotic novel and imagine you’re the main character,
getting all the sexual attention you can handle.
By emitting your sexual energy out to the
world, you will be surprised at the positive energy you can receive back, and
how much more confident you’ll feel.
9. Explore your sexual horizons
I’m not SAYING to go from monogamous twosome to orgygoers
overnight, or anything. But try opening your mind to erotic possibilities
beyond your comfort zone.
Even if you don’t do anything, being surrounded by sexy people in a kinky environment can spark a lot of things, especially your imagination. Whether you’re flying solo or in the company of your partner, an erotic party is a great way to meet like-minded, open-minded individuals, and maybe see new things – like people having sex in front of you. You don’t have to participate, but being a voyeur can certainly be an aphrodisiac. Who knows what erotic worlds you’ll open up…
And if you’re a frequent partygoer at these erotic events,
try a special theme night that takes you a little bit out of your comfort zone,
to introduce a kinky aspect to your night.
Spark some inspiration with some foreplay in a sexy new
locale, the car, a movie theater, the bathroom at a bar… wherever, really.
The thrill you’ll feel as you experience foreplay or sex in a risqué new place will give you both an adrenaline rush to fuel the fire in your sexcapades.
You can even try this out discreetly by wearing a remote-control
sex toy while you’re out on a date, and giving your partner the control. My personal
favorite toy for doing this is the wearable We-Vibe Jive.
No matter where you go, you’ll both feel sexier for having
tried something new together.
5. Add a new sex toy to the mix
If your sex games are getting a bit stale, whether solo or otherwise, time to try a new toy!
How adventurous do you want to be? Which part of your body
or your partner’s do you want to stimulate? Want to try a little BDSM?
The choice is ALL yours.
Now go back to #10 on this list (Seduce yourself), rinse and repeat.
4. Try out a new fantasy
Curious about getting tied up and blindfolded? Thinking of
dressing up and trying out some role play with your partner?
The first step is communicating with your partner when you’re out of the bedroom. This gives you time for you and your partner to talk about your fantasy and how you’d go about it or prepare whatever toys or scenario you might need for your new sexual forays.
Or, to break the ice, try dropping some hints first. You
could watch some porn together, listen to one of my podcasts, or read an excerpt
from an erotic novel out loud to him that express the fantasy or kink you have
in mind, then ask your partner what they think about it.
If you’ve been in a relationship for awhile, chances are you
forgot how to flirt.
Flirting creates a sense of newness, makes your pulse race, and makes you feel sexy.
When you’re in public, come up to your partner and pretend
you’re meeting them for the first time.
Compliment them on what they’re wearing. Remind them how
sexy they are. Reminisce about a time you had together that was extremely hot.
Single? Flirt with the hot guy who serves you coffee at the
local shop. Flirt with the cute chick at the bookstore.
Chances are, you’ll feel better, sexier, and get a rush of adrenaline and endorphins.
2. Change up your bedroom decor
Getting new sheets and/or bedcovers can really make a
If you can afford it, go a bit more luxe and opt for sheets
with a higher thread count, something that feels soft and sensual against your
Just changing up your bed – which is (usually) where you
wake up, fall asleep, have sex, masturbate, watch Netflix, text, peruse social
media, talk on the phone, and do so many other things, can make you feel like
you’re somewhere else, like at a fancy hotel or resort.
And when we’re on vacation, we’re feeling relaxed,
refreshed, and ready for sex.
1. Shed negative sexual energy.
YOU. ARE. FUCKING. GORGEOUS. You are amazing. Your body is incredible.
If your New Year’s goals include making important life
changes that are good for your health, that’s fantastic.
But don’t forget that confidence is within you! And confidence is the SEXIEST thing you can wear.
Self conscious about the way you taste? Don’t let your
partner go down on you enough? Don’t want to have sex in certain positions
because you’re worried about the way you look at certain angles? Can’t have sex
with the light on?
Fuck that! Get rid of all of that negativity. You are sexy, and you DESERVE to be worshiped.
So LET yourself go. Let go of that negativity that’s preventing you from having mind-blowing, out-of-body-experience style ecstasy, and experience pleasure like you’ve always deserved.