Welcome to my playground, experienced sexters and virgins alike!
(Oh, how I love de-virginizing virgins!!!)
Nothing keeps the fire burning in my pants like a filthy message from one of my lovers. And because I’m a little evil, I take pleasure in making my partners hard or wet by sending them a saucy text.
Sexting can achieve various goals, including riling up your lover (AND yourself!) as foreplay before you see them, staying connected when you’re apart, spicing up your relationship, and sharing fantasies you may be too shy to vocalize directly when you’re right in front of your partner.
Also, it’s just a HELL of a lot of filthy fun!
If you’re shy or you’ve never sent a sexy message before, here are some tips to inspire you to get nasssssty. Consider this Lexi’s Guide to Sexting!
Get yourself horny first.
If you’re not already spilling over with sexual desire as you prepare to write, get yourself into the state of mind where you’re fully craving the person you’re about to inundate with slutty words. Read an erotic story. Watch some porn. Masturbate a little if you want to.
Think of the last time you fucked, or something they did to you (or that you did to them) that drove you and/or them wild, or a fantasy you have which has yet to be fulfilled.
Once you’re thinking of them on that profoundly carnal level, you’ll find the words will just come and cum and cum…
Slip into the role.
Reach within you and unleash your inner sex god / goddess. Tell yourself: you are sexy, you are sex, you deserve to be desired and worshipped.
The power of positive (and sexy) thinking will help you gain confidence in what you write, especially if you’re a first-timer.
You can, of course, accompany your messages with a tarty pose of yourself or some of your lesser-clad body parts. That’s totally your prerogative. If you know your partner is super visual and you’re not down to take nude snaps of yourself, feel free to add a porn GIF or two to illustrate the intensity of your words. But you’ll leave more to the imagination by having your lover read your words and imagine only what you want them to.
If you just read this section and are pissed off because it may reduce the amount of dick and/or beaver shots you receive, that’s just too fucking bad.
Expand your filthy vocabulary.
If you don’t know how to talk dirty like a porn star, try reading some erotica or steal some lines from your favorite performer.
You can ease up on the language if you prefer: instead of saying “pussy” you can say “honey-pot”; instead of “cock” or “dick” you can say “love-dagger” or “hot meat”. I’m giggling right now, but I’m not slagging on you! I find euphemisms amusing. But in my experience, the more direct the language you use, the more effective your results.
Sext when they least expect it, and when you think they need it most.
Is your partner stuck at the airport, or office, or waiting in line somewhere? Is your lover having a rough day and not feeling sexy? Remind them how much you appreciate them with some nasty words.
Bonus points if you do this while you’re with them, like at a mundane family dinner, so when their phone vibrates to signal a notification, you can watch them and smile mischievously as they start to sweat right in front of you. You dirty voyeur, you!
Keep them actively engaged.
Ask your lucky recipient questions from time to time. “Can’t you just imagine me _(verb-ing)_ your _(body part(s))_ right now?”, “How would it feel if I ____?”, “Remember how wet you made me last night?”, “What would you do if I…”, etc.
If they’re not responsive (water droplets or eggplant emojis can be suitable responses), don’t send a ton of messages asking WHY!? Just wait patiently. Maybe they’re busy, surprised, or unsure of how to reply. And if they’re not interested, then, as Bruna Nessif would say, LET THAT SHIT GO!
Don’t get your partner to fantasize about things you would never, EVER dream of doing. That could lead to some disappointment when you finally do see each other.
You can go wild, but if you have zero intention to experiment with anal sex and you’re telling your partner you can’t wait to have them bury their cock or strap-on dildo deep in your ass, well, that’s kind of a cock / clit tease. I suggest you flirt with that fine line, but don’t TOTALLY go overboard.
[Important side note: This is just an exercise in fantasy, and you can be clear with your partner that this is a fantasy. No one should make you feel pressured to do anything you’re not fully comfortable doing. EVER. Your partner must respect that it’s your choice and it involves consent every step of the way.]
You don’t have to write a novel.
Who has TIME to write a whole scenario out via message?! Sure, I’ve done it, but it takes eons to craft. And you’re a busy bitch with no time for those shenanigans. One-liners are fully acceptable. And if you can’t think of what the fuck to say, ask Google for some erotic quotes and copy/paste those instead.
Take my advice with a chunk of salt.
Not a grain, a chunk. If any of this advice makes you feel uncomfortable, or you haven’t yet fully embraced your Lexuality, tailor my tips to your needs and your personality, vocabulary, and your comfort level.
Want to share your sexting tips, or ask me a question?